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My Head Hurts!!!

I don't know what it is lately, but have you seen some of the upcoming movies that are expected in the next few months?

Did Hollywood suffer a brain seizure, or are they simply recycling because it's easier than THINKING up new ideas??

Let's see... we've got Cedric the Entertainer doing Jackie Gleason's role in a remake of the Honeymooners. This has FLOP written all over it.

How about Adam Sandler reprising Burt Reynold's role in The Longest Yard? At least they're sticking to the script, and even managed to find a role for Burt himself. Of the remakes this one looks like it'll be a success.

Then we've got Bewitched. Nicole Kidman plays essentailly Samantha Stevens, but the warp is this: She's a witch who's trying to live a normal life and ends up being an actress playing... you've got it, Samantha Stevens in a remake of the television show, "Bewitched." If that doesn't make your head hurt from the circular logic, I don't know what will.

We've got remakes of "The Bad News Bears"... and a new Herbie, the Love Bug... another Deuce Bigalow movie (ARGH!)... a remake of the Amityville Horror... The Pink Panther (sorry, Steve Martin, there's only one)... Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (ok, it's Johnny Depp... maybe there's a chance.)... House of Wax (Vincent Price is rolling in his grave)...

It's going to be a long, LONG summer at the movies...


( 7 comments — Leave a comment )
Apr. 3rd, 2005 03:36 am (UTC)
Which is why it may be better to stick to animated films this coming season. No sequels. =};-3
Apr. 3rd, 2005 09:33 pm (UTC)
But what animated films are there going to be? The ones I know of (Madagascar, the sequel to Ice Age) I believe aren't coming out til the end of the year?
Apr. 3rd, 2005 09:53 pm (UTC)
Robots, Steamboy and Pooh's Heffalump Movie have already come out.

Coming up for the rest of this year are Madagascar (May), Howl's Moving Castle(April), Corpse Bride(October), Valiant(August), Wallace and Gromit: Curse of the Werebunny (September), and Chicken Little (November). Not all of them look promising, but like I said, no sequels.

Ice Age 2 will be in 2006, along with Cars and Shrek 3.
Apr. 3rd, 2005 04:20 am (UTC)

Apr. 3rd, 2005 06:43 am (UTC)

And then there's the "Doom" movie with The Rock and Karl Urban.
Which is not set on Mars. And does not feature demons from hell.
Which begs the question:


And how about the "Dukes Of Hazzard" movie?
It's directed by Jay Chandrasekhar, who directed "Supertroopers" (which has its moments).
It will star Johnny Knoxville and Seannnnnnnn William Scott as the Duke boys,
Jessica "chicken or tuna?" Simpson as Daisy Duke, Willie Nelson as Uncle Jesse,
and guess who gets to play Boss Hogg?


No wonder our heads hurt.
Oh well, "Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy" comes out next month.
Criswell predicts it will r0xx0rs your s0xx0rs!!!

Apr. 3rd, 2005 09:32 pm (UTC)
The preview for Herbie actually didn't look that bad... as long as you gave it the subtitle "Herbie Meets Nascar"... fiancee wanted to see it. I'm sorta like, eh, I got over Herbie at the age of 10 or so.

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory's a difficult one for me, because it has those sorts of kitschy kinky moments in the original that make you think, okay, what can they do to top them now? And there was a very nice chocolate-dunking in the promo... very conflicted.

Let us not forget another version of Hitchhiker's Guide... although that might work out okay.
Apr. 4th, 2005 03:46 pm (UTC)
Johnny and the Chocolate Factory
As long as Johnny Depp was conscious for the making of this one, as opposed to the condition he was apparently in for Blow, it should be pretty good. On the other hand, that condition actually is appropriate for that particular movie...and that's exactly what it did. Hope he keeps that one out of his filmography.
( 7 comments — Leave a comment )